Thursday 1 June 2017

WHAT THEY SAY WHEN YOU'RE NOT THERE.


Yes. I've come again.

I believe the title is self explanatory, I'll delve straight into the reasons I decided to talk about this.

The yearly Easter period sees lots of festivities within its dates. As customary, wedding ceremonies take alarming precedence; practically every street has a bride to be during this time. It happened my good friend got married to her long time beau during this year's Easter festivities. I graced the occasion with my one of a kind low-key presence. At the point I sat with a mutual friend I heard lots of things, what people had to say about the young couple.

This particular clique sat behind me spread out to my left hand side. About four of them, three ladies and a man. They were friends of the bride, save for one of them (the ring-leader, a slay mama) who realized midway the ceremony that she also knew the groom. You needed to see the lamentation in her voice - lamentation expertly laced behind clamors of fake-excitement. I could tell they were fake because its my joy uncovering slay-idiots and their misguided way. According to her, the guy used to live across her room at acertain point in his education journey, and she couldn't believe he was getting married.

'Benji, is getting married. It's a lie! Small Benji. Jesus!'

Her wails were endless. I was almost tempted to asked if she had a thing for the guy, or if they once ran a certain package, to stylishly signal my friend to beware of her and wiles she might present in the near unforeseen future. But it later became clear that she was suffering from a case of latent-jealousy.

At first, I am sure, slay-mama Nkoli (let's call her Nkoli), would have been shaken when Ada (let's say that's the bride's name) invited her for the wedding. Girls can be unnecessary covetous even when they don't need the bone of contention. Nkoli arriving the ceremony in all her slay glory and recognizing the groom, and coming to realize that what Benji and Ada share she doesn't yet have, and might not in a long while because she's still slaying, buried strains of jealousy begin to rise up like Christ did. In fact, I think wedding ceremonies should be banned from Easter period; maybe that's the cause.

Anyways, this is the tale of one slay mama/ trap princess/ slay queen/ trap idiot, started to blow her mouth out of proportion. When she realized she was beginning to draw much attention, she ended by praising the couple,

'Both of them are responsible sha!'

And that was when her slay man, or should I saw sugar bobo added his own, 'Responsible people are the ones that make mistake the most.' And that was how another round of gossip started. SMH!
So know, whatever it is, people must talk, and it's not because they care; nobody cares; but because their lives are so empty they hope to fill up the void at that moment by trashing yours. That high feel is temporal, yet mind-blowing. But then, is it worth it?

What do you say at other people's back? Answer this before you start to curse and castigate this slay-mama, or wonder what people are saying at your own back.

- Rinzy Talius Dike

(Tweet @TaliusDike, and @LSbyTalius)
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